Your Character Sheet
Therapy homework on picking my own values, in D&D terms. Other people rolled my stats before I got to pick them, and I'd been playing a build meant for a tragic, noble ending. This is me asking what happens if I respec for joy instead.
They hand you out a character sheet the day that you are born
With "Family," "Honor," "Honesty" and "Being Un-Adorned"
With any kind of "Selfishness" or "Want" or "Primal Need"
They fill your inventory up with their own, broken creed
And you've been playing this whole game, a Level 40 champ
With a build that's "Lawful Good" inside a dark and evil camp
You're wondering why you're dying, why the game is all on fire
And your "Honor" stat is just a weight that's dragging in the mire
'Cause the gurus say, "Just know your values! Live your one true life!"
A simple, stupid, little phrase they sharpen like a knife
But a value's just a weapon, and you've only got ten slots
And you've filled 'em all with "Suffer!" when you should be calling shots!
So let's review your Character Sheet!
What's the stat you're gonna cheat?
Are you specced for “Tragic, Noble End" or "Joy and Fucking Peace"?
It's time to take your broken build and find a new release!
'Cause "Values Clarification"
Is just a trickster's re-allocation
Of the points you've got to spend, my friend, to build a better YOU
It's just your Character Sheet! (So write a new one!)
You've maxed your "Integrity," it's epic, it's divine
The problem is, it's "Soulbound," and it's on a shared decline
With a world that's running on "Deceit" and "Quiet, Little Sins"
You can't equip your "Happy Button" 'til the other side just wins
Your "Empathy" is legendary, a massive, glowing pool
But it's drained your mana dry and left you looking like a fool
You're a healer in a party that is only built for tanks
And you're the one who's dying while they're offering their "thanks"!
Yeah, the gurus say, "Just know your values! Live your one true life!"
A simple, stupid, little phrase they sharpen like a knife
But a value's just a weapon, and you've only got ten slots
And you've filled 'em all with "Suffer!" when you should be calling shots!
So let's review your Character Sheet!
What's the stat you're gonna cheat?
Are you specced for "Tragic, Noble End" or "Joy and Fucking Peace"?
It's time to take your broken build and find a new release!
'Cause "Values Clarification"
Is just a trickster's re-allocation
Of the points you've got to spend, my friend, to build a better YOU
It's just your Character Sheet! (So write a new one!)
So maybe take a single point from "Hold the Fucking Sky"
And put it into "Build a Boat and Wave the World Goodbye"
Or drain the "Anxious Analysis" that's burning out your head
And max your "Sovereign Napping" stat and just stay in your bed
It's not a sin, it's not a flaw, it's not a moral test
It's just the right of any player to decide he wants to rest
And change his build…
And re-spec his skills…
And tell the DM that this quest is bullshit!
So let's review your Character Sheet!
What's the stat you're gonna cheat?
Are you specced for "Tragic, Noble End" or "Joy and Fucking Peace"?
It's time to take your broken build and find a new release!
'Cause "Values Clarification"
Is just a trickster's re-allocation
Of the points you've got to spend, my friend, to build a better YOU
It's just your Character Sheet! (So write a new one!)
New build. Who dis?