Mixed Reviews (Remastered)
The ancient dwarves of Dwelodain had eaten nothing but black cave leaves for ages, so Steven used a little flavoring spell to give them a taste of his home world's snack aisle. Most of them grumbled. One of them loved it so much he planted a big bearded kiss right on Steven's lips.
Prestidigitation
Light or snuff a candle, etc, etc
Clean or soil no
Aha! Chill, warm or flavor up to 1 cubic foot!
Master Chef, here I come!
Down in ancient Dwelodain
Elder dwarves feel eternal pain
Again for dinner just black cave leaves
They need something more extreme
Good thing Steven's got a trick for that
The very best cantrip, in fact
He'll Prestidigitate their food
Most thought he was mighty rude
Hit 'em Steven, one more time
With the magic that makes their eyes shine
The new flavor to this strange land
They'll love the taste of your cool ranch
Groans and mutters fill the room
Until one voice crowds out the gloom
An excellent yield! one dwarf proclaims
Chowing down without restraint
One of many's not so bad
At least the rest aren't fighting mad
Maybe that they're old and creaking
Means they can't taste what they're eating
Hit 'em Steven, one more time
With the magic that makes their eyes shine
The new flavor to this strange land
They'll love the taste of your cool ranch
That one dwarf, blessed by Steven's touch
Begs him, Brother, another punch
Holds his bowl out, asks him please
Steven says, try nacho cheese!
He takes a nibble, then a chomp
Grabs Steven's face, and with a stomp
Smack of delight, beard root to tips
Kisses Steven full on the lips!
Steven, unexpected star
Of Dwelodain, forgotten cairn
If they're done now, another think
When those novels get read by Menk
Hit 'em Steven, one more time
With the magic that makes their eyes shine
The new flavor to this strange land
They'll love the taste of your cool ranch
Hit 'em, Steven, one more time
With magic that makes their eyes shine
What other tastes of your home world
Can Prestidigitate unfurl?
Please, brother, one more time!
Mmmm, that nacho cheese!